Being a part of a team is a cool thing, because there are so many different perspectives in one group. That being said I have the utmost respect for Sam, but I couldn’t disagree with him more on his post “You Can Create Your Wife”. Check that out if you haven’t already.
I don’t care how much time you take with a girl, there is no way that you can turn her into “wife material”. That doesn’t mean that she can’t turn into wife material, or that you can’t help her do it, it just means that you cannot be the sole catalyst for this change. Of course there are exceptions to every rule, and there are cases where my theory does not apply, however this is the minority by far.
As I told Sam, you can’t turn a Maxima into a Benz. His reply was that he can change the interior and the motor to be better than a Benz. I guess in theory this is true, but like I said earlier there are exceptions to every rule. Let’s look at the bigger picture. The amount of time and effort you would put into changing your Maxima into a Benz wouldn’t make sense because at the end of the day, it’s still not a Benz. This is deeper than a car analogy. You may be able get someone to change how they appear, but I do not believe you have the power to change a person. No matter how much you dress them up they will still be who they are deep down inside.
Sadly a lot of people do think they have the power to change a person. These are the same people who end up getting played because they actually believe they can change a persons morals or values. I am not saying people can’t change, that is not how I feel at all. However if a person is going to change, it is not going to be because of another person. If a person acts differently when they are single than they do when they are in a relationship, that is just a testament to their own character, not the power we have to change them. If you put gold plating over a copper necklace sooner or later the truth will be revealed. The only way a person can truly change is if they want to do it for themselves. The only thing you can do is help them along the way.
In conclusion a person may change, but I don’t think we should stroke our egos and take the credit for the change, because it is either one of two things: Either the person has truly made a change to better themselves, or they haven’t really changed and you’ll find out a little too late.