Meet the Trumps

Barron Trump

e46f1273ca1900340cfab78c2b05a388Meet this little bugger, Barron Trump. This egg is Donald Trump’s youngest child. He likes to wear suits and speaks his mother Melania’s, native language of Slovene fluently. I have weird suspicions that this child is Trump’s favorite because even though there’s a Donald Trump, Jr., the President-elect nicknamed him “Mini-Donald”. You might recognize him from his notable reaction to some turd’s comment to murder our current President. (video)

Breakfast at Tiffany Ariana Trump


Tiffany is one of those people where you’re not sure if she got into an ivy league because her daddy rich or if she’s low-key a brainiac.  Anyways, she considers herself to be pretty grounded. (video) She is the only spawn of Trump & Maria Maples, so she spends most of her time with mom out on the West Coast as opposed to the rest of the youngins who live in the Big Apple.

Donald Jr., Ivanka and Eric



I’m clumping these last three because they grew up together and collectively work at the Trump Organization in New York City. They’re like the power team and I’m slightly intimidated. You can tell these are Trump’s prodigies, his pride and joys. It would’ve felt weird not to put them all together. Ivanka was a model early on, following in her mother Ivana’s footsteps before retiring to business. Don John Jr., the first born on New Years Eve was almost like an ultra light beam for Donald Sr. Don Jr. married a model who later birthed Donald Trump the Third. Eric is kinda like the Andre Lyon (Empire reference, shoot me) of the Trump family. He graduated with Honors from Georgetown. His resume is dope and definitely one to be proud of.

Melania Trump


Anyways, here’s the whole gang. Melania in the middle slaying per usual. Melania got nudes, I’m all about female empowerment. I wonder about her in ways that go beyond her great looks. I know there’s more to her, but her looks give me enough life. If you’re curious, here’s 14 things you didn’t know about Donald Trump’s wife: (article).

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