currency-of-happiness

Happiness

 

There are memories that haunt me every day. I have nightmares that drive me crazy while I’m awake. I’ve kept secrets I wish I didn’t, I wish I could forget them. I’ve caused pain I wish I never caused. I’ve put others happiness before mine. I’ve temporarily taken peoples happiness. I’ve pushed everyone away, I pushed you away the furthest. Why did I push you away the furthest? I feel pain that kills my soul. I kept quiet because she said “I was so weird” I still feel that pain. I still carry the thought of us every day. I still have hope for people. In you, in us, in me. I’m that little boy, pure like a new born. I’m lost and don’t know where to go next. I can’t follow the crowd, I don’t trust them. I can’t follow my instinct it keeps letting me down. I’m still that little boy. I’m just not so pure anymore. I still feel pain. I was broken. The pieces were in front of me. You scattered my pieces. First I’ll find my strength, then I’ll look for my pieces. Finally I’ll put them back together, and keep going forward.

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